Wednesday, March 19, 2008

One really isn't so lonely...

By the time I had graduated college, I had been a bridesmaid four times, a maid of honor two of those times, and had a running tally of all the people I knew who were engaged. At one point, the list exceeded 25 couples. I had some very busy, wedding-filled summers. Some couples got crossed off, some names changed, some families formed, and some hearts were broken. It all went on this list.

It's just another part of the twentysomething's life that relationships are formed and broken. Some of those relationships head towards marriage. So singleness or coupledom is a part of the process.

In my situation, I am an incredibly happy single. I have enough drama in my life in the moment, and this is one part of life in which I am currently content. Perhaps it's because I'm surrounded by friends (girls and guys) who so desperately want to love and be loved that they get a little desperate, or perhaps it's because I'm fiercely independent and don't want to be defined by anyone else, but whatever the reason, I'm a happy single.

I just learned a new term for this. It's "quirkyalone," by the book and website of the same name. According to this New York Times article, a quirkyalone is someone who “generally prefers to be alone rather than date for the sake of being in a couple.” I've spent years trying to explain my contented state to friends and relatives, so it's nice to know that I'm not the only one who feels this way. If I meet someone, great. If not, I'm not going to worry too much about it.

I also learned that if you want to embrace your consumerism and your singleness at the same time, you can buy a single ring, or "Singelringen" from a company in Sweden. (On their website they say, "Singles of the world - Unite!" Isn't that kind of contradictory?)

What are your thoughts? Are you a quirkyalone? A blissful newleywed? Just starting a new relationship? Or wishing you were? How do you think this all affects a quarterlife crisis?

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